Contrary to what most of us grew up believing, the hymen is not a flat piece of skin covering the opening of the vagina only to be torn apart or punctured while having sex for the first time. If that were true, there would be no way for menstrual blood to exit the vagina during a period. For all its fabled mystery, the hymen is a body part like any other.
Having said that, hymens come in many shapes and sizes; some are thick and some are thin, some have tiny punctures while others are one singular hole, some look as if they have a series of tears in them, others look like they’ve been split down the middle, and some aren’t born with one at all. That’s just the beginning. Like all body parts, each hymen is unique to the person that owns it.
For those new to sex positive education, interested in learning about their body or the bodies of others, this post should cover everything you need to know about the hymen.
What is the Hymen?
The hymen is a thin membrane made of elastic tissue that partially covers the vaginal opening in some people, and its appearance can vary widely from person to person. Contrary to many myths, the hymen doesn’t serve a specific biological function. It is simply a small part of our anatomy and, for some, it may gradually thin or change with physical activities such as exercise, tampon use, or sexual intercourse. Over time, many hymens become stretched or naturally wear down, while for others, they remain more intact.
What does your hymen look like?
If you’re curious about what your hymen looks like, following these steps should make the process much easier:
What you’ll need: a mirror, preferably one that sits on a stand (if you can get one that magnifies, even better), a place you feel comfortable where you have some privacy, and a flashlight.
- Prop yourself up against something stable while sitting on the floor (a bed, wall, couch – something that wont shift) and spread your legs so that your comfortable and able to lean forward (this will allow you to look in the mirror closer if need be).
- Position the mirror between your legs so you have a full view of your genitals.
- Once comfortable, slowly spread the lips of your vulva (labia majora and minora) with one of your free hands.
- When looking keep in mind the hymen is usually located 1 – 2 cm inside the vaginal opening, not deep inside the vaginal canal.
If you find a thin layer of skin with a small hole (or holes) present, your hymen is most likely ‘intact’. If you notice small traces of broken skin surrounding your vaginal opening, you may have already stretched or torn your hymen.
Regardless of what you find it’s normal, natural, and nothing to be freaked out by. If you do happen to have any concerns try talking to a parent, trusted knowledgeable adult or friend, doctor, searching trusted sex education sites online, or reading informational sex ed books.
Different Types of Hymens
The hymen comes in various shapes and structures, all of which are natural and normal. Here are some of the common types:
Annular Hymen: This is the most common type, with a ring-shaped opening that partially surrounds the vaginal entrance. It allows space for menstruation or other secretions to pass through.
Imperforate or Microperforate Hymen: Less commonly, the hymen may have very small or no openings. In cases of an imperforate hymen, menstrual blood can’t pass through, which can lead to discomfort and may require a minor medical procedure to open the tissue.
Crescent-Shaped Hymen: Shaped like a crescent moon, this type of hymen partially covers the lower portion of the vaginal opening and tends to be a bit more flexible.
Cribriform Hymen: This type of hymen has multiple small openings across the membrane, resembling a sieve or mesh. Menstrual blood can still pass through, but a cribriform hymen may sometimes cause discomfort and require medical attention if it restricts the flow.
Septate Hymen: In this type, the hymen has a thin strip of extra tissue down the middle, creating two small openings instead of one. Some people with a septate hymen choose to have the tissue surgically separated if it causes discomfort.
It’s crucial to remember that hymens can vary greatly in appearance and elasticity, and each type is a natural variation of anatomy.
Below are examples of various hymens which can act as a guide to help you find yours.
Understanding Hymen-Related Experiences
Knowing more about the hymen can help reduce anxiety and debunk misconceptions. For those concerned about first-time intercourse, remember that relaxation, open communication, and using lubricant can help ensure a more comfortable experience. If you’re experiencing discomfort due to your hymen, particularly with certain types like the septate or imperforate hymen, speaking with a healthcare professional can provide helpful guidance.
It’s also worth noting that the concept of “virginity” as related to the hymen is largely a cultural or societal construct. The state of someone’s hymen doesn’t determine their value, identity, or sexual experience. This is an important aspect of body autonomy and accepting that everyone’s anatomy – and their experiences with it – are unique.
Dispelling Common Hymen Myths
Myths about the hymen are widespread and often tied to ideas about virginity, sexual experience, and purity. Here are a few myths, along with the facts:
Myth: The hymen “breaks” during first-time intercourse.
Fact: The hymen stretches, and while some people may feel discomfort or notice a bit of bleeding, many won’t. The “breaking” or “popping” narrative is misleading, as hymens can stretch gradually over time and aren’t always impacted by intercourse.
Myth: Bleeding Means Virginity
Fact: On that note, bleeding during first-time intercourse is often associated with “virginity” or the idea that the hymen must bleed when “broken.” The truth is that bleeding can happen for various reasons, including lack of lubrication, tension, or other factors, and doesn’t necessarily correlate with the state of the hymen. Some people bleed, and others don’t, so it’s not a reliable measure of virginity or past sexual experiences.
Myth: The Hymen’s Presence Confirms Virginity
Fact: This is one of the most pervasive myths, but the hymen is not a definitive indicator of sexual activity. Many activities, like sports, tampon use, or simple stretching, can alter or stretch the hymen. Some people are even born with very little or no hymenal tissue at all. Virginity is a personal concept that isn’t determined by anatomy.
Myth: Pregnancy is Impossible if the Hymen is Intact
Fact: It’s possible to become pregnant even if the hymen remains intact. Sperm can reach the vaginal canal if semen enters the area, regardless of the hymen’s presence. Thus, birth control and protection are important for sexually active individuals, even if penetration hasn’t occurred.
Myth: All Hymens Look The Same
Fact: Hymens are as unique as fingerprints. There is no single “normal” appearance, and the variations are just part of the body’s natural diversity.
Myth: A Hymen That Hasn’t Changed Means It’s Intact
Fact: Hymenal tissue changes over time for various reasons, and its appearance isn’t an indicator of sexual experience or any particular state.
Final Thoughts
Understanding that the hymen is just one part of anatomy, with natural variations and no definitive link to virginity or sexual experience, can make conversations about sex, pleasure, and health more open and supportive. If you have questions about your own body or notice discomfort, it’s always a good idea to reach out to a healthcare provider. Remember, anatomy varies from person to person, and taking the time to understand these differences can empower us all to approach sexual health with confidence, respect, and a sense of curiosity.
Hopefully through watching the video your questions will be answered and you’ll gather some valuable insight about the hymen, along with changing your views on the perceptions associated with it.
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