Does your partner struggle to satisfy you in the bedroom? Do your dates always seem to end with intimate incompatibility? If you’re tired of having a listless experience under the sheets, here are six tips for re-learning your body, re-igniting your passion, and re-invigorating your sex life.
1. Figure Out What You Want
This is actually a lot easier than it sounds; however embarrassment tends to get in the way of honest self-reflection when it comes to sexual desires. If you’re serious about having better orgasms, you’ll need to push past your insecurities and ask yourself what you really like. What gets your motor running? What touches or actions make you weak in the knees every single time?
2. Buy Sex Toys
Womens Sex toys can be both fun and educational. Not only can they help you learn your body’s hot spots, they can also be valuable tools for stretching, sensitizing, or acclimating yourself for further play. You don’t have to jump right into the back end of the catalogue; you can get comfortable with smaller, more discreet toys first. Who knows? They might even give you new fantasy fodder! Not sure what you’d like? Not to worry. I’ve crafted a ‘sex toy guide‘ that will help you find exactly what you’re looking for!
3. Get Imaginative
Speaking of fantasies, they’re perfectly normal and nothing to be ashamed of, even if they’re things that you don’t actually like or condone in “real life.” The whole point of a fantasy is that it’s self-indulgent. It comes from your imagination, a place where there are no rules and no consequences. Even if you aren’t quite ready to take your daydreams from your mind to your bedroom, it’s fine to have fun with mental scenarios.
4. Improve the Mood
It’s hard to feel sexy when the carpet smells like dog and you keep noticing the laundry pile out of the corner of your eye. For a better atmosphere during date night, use some of these tips:
– Send the kids and pets to their grandparents’ house.
– Wash your sheets; tidy your bedroom; dim the lights.
– Take a long, hot and luxurious shower while imagining what’s to come.
– Light some candles or burn some incense.
– Put on soft music.
5. Try New Positions
If you’ve only ever made love in the “missionary” position, you’re missing out on an entire world of sex positions. From bendy, acrobatic stretches to tender embraces that increase the intimacy of the moment, there are all kinds of angles and inclines to experiment with as you broaden your sexual horizons. If something doesn’t work for you, don’t force it; just change positions and try again.
6. Ignore Sex Tips from Movies and Magazines
One new trick isn’t going to change your sex life. If you’re consistently underwhelmed in the bedroom, the problem goes deeper than what an ice cube can fix. Ask yourself: What’s holding you back from bigger, bolder orgasms? What insecurities do you have when you take off your clothes? How can you overcome them? What would make you comfortable with yourself as a sexual being?
Whether your married and looking to spice things up or a singleton hoping for a little relief from a prolonged dry spell, it’s common for your sex life to suffer as you get older. Use these tips to turn things around and re-take control of your pleasure.